


Anata no ude no naka de (In your arms)

by vogue91



Category: Hey! Say! JUMP, Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Caretaking, Established Relationship, Fever, Fluff, M/M, Whining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-23
Updated: 2018-06-23
Packaged: 2019-05-27 07:31:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15019721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vogue91/pseuds/vogue91
Summary: He was tired. More than tired. Exhausted. Devastated. He felt like the next step he was going to take would've been his last, and he almost hoped it was.





	Anata no ude no naka de (In your arms)

Ryosuke had never been the whiny type.

He could complain about trivial stuff, when he was in a bad mood or when he tried to get someone’s attention, but when there actually was something wrong he’d rather keep to himself, trying to be as cheerful as usual, as to not give any hint that there was something going on.

Right now, though, he really wanted to scream.

He wanted to fall on his knees, there on stage, and stay there until someone would've arrived to grab him and drag him away; possibly, to leave him in a bed under a blanket. Possibly, Daiki, but he felt he wasn’t going to fight if someone else would've come to rescue him, as long as that torture would've ended.

He hadn't felt good for a couple of days; he had caught a cold, a bad one, but he hadn't minded it much. The day before he had felt even worse, but he had extorted a couple of aspirins from Hikaru and somehow he had made it to the night, when the rehearsal for the Nagano’s concert had finally ended.

He had tried to go to bed early, telling Daiki he was just tired, and he had hoped that whatever it was it was going to go away on its own during the night.

Now, a little over half the concert, he was about to give up.

He was _tired_. More than tired. Exhausted. Devastated. He felt like the next step he was going to take would've been his last, and he almost hoped it was.

Daiki had gotten close to him while they sang, making an effort to keep smiling but at the same time throwing questioning looks at him.

Behind the scenes he hadn't gotten a chance to talk to him, but even if he had Ryosuke would've likely kept pretending he felt fine.

It made no sense to let him worry, not during the concert at least.

“Ryosuke?” the train of his thoughts got interrupted by Yuri, and when the elder raised his eyes on him he realized he must’ve called him a few times already.

“What? What is it?” he asked, blinking a few times, feeling his eyes watery.

“Come on, stop daydreaming. We’ve got to get back on stage for the encore.” he told him, impatient.

He dragged his arm, and Yamada winced, following the other back on stage as if he was walking toward the gallows.

He found the strength to keep singing. To keep moving, if he was forced to. To wave at the fans, smile, trying to react when the others tried to involve him, but he knew he had reached his limit.

And he was starting to feel annoyed, even though he knew it wasn’t rational.

Where was Daiki? Why wasn’t he saving him?

He was starting to wonder how inappropriate would've actually been to run toward him, throw himself in his arms and fall asleep like that, but in the end he gave up.

He wasn’t still so out of his mind to do something like that, but he was enough to start having visions of bed, blankets and medicines.

And Daiki’s arms. He was sure that if only the elder had hugged him right now he would've had the strength to stand the last minutes of this torture, but he was on the other side of the stage, busy waving and throwing a few sneaky looks at him.

Ryosuke winced, careful not to be seen.

Who knew how long it was left to the end of that damn concert.

 

~

 

“Ryo?”

Daiki’s voice came muffled to him when he finally collapsed on the bed, groaning noisily.

He didn’t answer, and not because he didn’t want to. It was like he was having a hard time articulating words, and he hoped his boyfriend would've realized that.

A few moments later the elder joined him in the bedroom, putting his bag on the ground and sitting at the end of the bed, frowning.

“Kota said that they’re going to get something to eat. What do you want to do, want to go with them?”

Yamada found the strength to raise his head, looking disgusted.

The mere idea of eating, right now, nauseated him.

“No, thank you. I'm not hungry.”

A few moments of silence followed, and he didn’t know how to interpret them; he felt Daiki fidget on the bed, and then getting closer.

“Ryosuke what’s wrong? Why aren't you hungry?” he bit his lip, unsure. “Have I done something wrong? You’ve been weird for the whole night. You’ve ignored him, and you’ve been off during the whole concert. What can have I done of so serious to make you lose your appetite?” he asked, trying to keep his voice amused, but failing at hiding the apprehension behind the question.

Ryosuke would've laughed at his concern, if doing so hadn't required a physical effort.

“You did nothing wrong.” he murmured. “You’re an idiot, Dai-chan. You’re really an idiot.” he said then, suddenly irritated. “How can you not see it? Don’t you see I'm close to dying? Don’t you see I surely have a fever, that I’ve been sick for the whole concert, that... ah!” he whined, rolling around the bedspread and wrapping himself. “You’re a useless boyfriend. Go away.” he ordered, writhing under the blanket and trying to get under it, finding out sadly that it was going to be impossible without getting up.

Daiki sighed deeply, closing his eyes for a moment.

“Is it this, then?” he asked, relieved. “Ryo-chan, honey, I thought something terrible had happened, that you were mad at me or something, instead...”

“Daiki!” the younger interrupted him, frowning. “Instead I'm sick! What, are you glad I'm sick and you’ve ignored me? Isn’t it something serious?”

Daiki sighed, shaking his head.

He didn’t reply to his boyfriend, he chose to get even closer, pulling the blankets from under him and undoing the tangle he had made of them, then he took off his shirt and undid his belt.

“What are you doing? Does it look like the right moment? I'm sick, I hate you and sex is likely the last thing I...”

The elder glared at him, stretching toward his suitcase.

“I'm trying to put your pyjamas on, silly. You said you feel awful and that you’re about to die, that I’ve ignored you and that I've done nothing for you... I'm just try to remedy it.” he explained, and just then Yamada shut up, letting the elder take his clothes off and help him into his pyjamas, then he got under the blankets.

“I'm sorry, I shouldn’t have gotten mad at you. But, Dai-chan...” he shrugged, sighing. “I don’t like being sick. The concert’s been horrible today, and I didn’t know what to do. No, well, I wanted you to do something, but I didn’t want to make you worry. It’s...” he chuckled, embarrassed. “It’s a nonsense, right?”

Daiki laughed, nodding.

“What did you want me to do, chibi?” he asked tenderly, caressing his forehead and finding that it was actually hot.

“To hug me.” the younger replied confidently. “To hug me, to apologize with the audience and to take me away. Holding me. And take me back to the hotel to get me under the blankets, and take care of me.”

“I'm sorry, I'm late to create a scandal that would've likely sunk all the Hey! Say! JUMP. But now you’re under the blankets, right? I still have time to take care of you.” he said, leaning over to softly kiss his lips.

Yamada didn’t catch, or pretended he didn’t catch, the irony in his voice.

He nodded vigorously, pulling the covers up to his neck.

“Can you give me something for the fever? I think it’s rising, I don’t really feel good. And I’ve got a little headache. And nausea.”

Daiki was tired after the concert, but if before he couldn’t wait to eat something and get to bed, right now he seemed to have forgotten about how tired he was.

He tried to find something for Ryosuke, and after the younger had taken his medicines he got back next to him, instinctively starting to caress his forehead again.

“Dai-chan... you know, when I said I was about to die, it was clearly an overstatement. So it’s not necessary for you to stay here as if I actually had a few minutes left to live.” Ryosuke made fun of him, while the elder shrugged, apparently not intentioned to stop.

“It doesn’t matter. I’ve been a bad boyfriend and now I’m going to set it straight, whether you want or not.” he sighed, kissing the side of his head. “Anyway, you could’ve told you didn’t feel good before the concert. We could’ve done something to make you better. I know you don’t like to tell you’re sick, chibi, but you can't even neglect yourself like this and then come to the point where... what are you doing?” he interrupted himself, seeing his boyfriend try to pull on his arm, frowning.

“I'm trying to take care of myself, to feel better and all that other stuff you said. But you clearly aren't cooperating.” he informed him, still trying to pull him closer until the other caved; he made as to lay over the covers, but Ryosuke was faster than him and pulled them up, letting him under them with him.

“Could you please tell me how this solves it?” Daiki asked, looking amused, while the younger pressed himself against him and hid his face in the crook of his neck, sighing blissfully.

“I told you, right?” Yamada said. “There’s no better medicine than this. This is why I'm sick in the first place, you know? It’s your fault for not cuddling me enough. And you don’t love me enough, and you don’t pay enough attention to me.” he scolded him, wrapping his arms around him to get even closer.

“Of course.” Daiki replied, caustic. “It’s true. I love you so little that look how bad you’ve gotten.” he pretended to agree, then he shook his head and sighed.

“Exactly my point.”

“Ryosuke!” the elder pulled him closer despite everything, slowly kissing him. “You can say whatever you want. You can say I didn’t realize right away that you were sick, you can say I did nothing for you, but you can't really say I don’t love you.” he sighed again, bringing a hand under his chin and making him raise his face. “If I really didn’t love you I would've run and hid in someone else’s room to escape the germs, I would've thrown an aspirin to you and I would've come back tomorrow to check you were still alive.”

The younger bit his lip, thinking about it.

“You would've never done something like that.” he pointed out, making his boyfriend laugh.

“Of course I wouldn’t.” he kissed his lips softly, brushing his hair back. “I don’t think you would've survived much longer like this. You know, maybe I've underestimated the whole thing; if you say you’re not hungry, then you really must have some mortal illness.” he made fun of him, easily dodging a weak blow from the other.

They kept quiet for a while, so long that Daiki started to believe his boyfriend had fallen asleep.

He loosened the hug, slowly, making as to take his wrists to make him do the same, but he met resistance.

“Don’t even try it.” Ryosuke muttered, holding him tight, without opening his eyes. “You know, if you were to get away I’d have a turn for the worse right away.” he went on, then he smiled and brushed his face against the other’s chest.

He sighed theatrically, and hugged him again.

“I should’ve really left you here alone waiting to get better. Look what I’ve gotten myself into.” he mocked him.

“You couldn’t. You love me, right? Then stay and hug me until I’ll feel better.” he murmured.

“You say that as if it was a punishment for me.”

“Isn’t it?”

Daiki stretched to reach the switch, turning the lights off and getting back under the covers, searching a comfortable position to hug his boyfriend, letting him rest his head against him.

“You know what, chibi?” he whispered in his ear. “As far as it concerns me, if I have to stay like this you may even not get better too soon.”

“You’re a terrible boyfriend, do you know that?”

Daiki burst out laughing, nodding.

“The worst ever. You’re going to have time to get mad at me when the fever will be  gone.” he held him tighter, kissing him. “Rest well, Ryo-chan. I love you.”

“All fiction.” the younger muttered, his voice heavy with sleep.

Daiki didn’t say anything else and watched him cave to tiredness, in the darkness of the room.

He closed his eyes, then, trying to sleep as well, aware that in that position he risked to never achieve that. He was starting to get hungry, also, while the post-concert tiredness came back, alongside the feeling that that proximity was going to make him sick as well.

But he didn’t care.

There wasn’t price he wasn’t willing to pay to spend as long as he could with Ryosuke in his arms.


End file.
